SpiderAg
500+ posts
05/06/06 04:27 AM
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Why the Cotton Bowl should not EVER be renavated
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I member back on January One 1999 I went to the Cotton Bowl cuzz my Lord and Saver was a actin as the Missippy State head coach.
I drunk up about eight measures a vodka fore kickoff and I was a swangin cowbells with my Missippy brethren like they was lamb carcasses on the hook after another meat judgin vicktree.
Come hafftime I done added bout seven pints a Cotton Bowl keg beer to my bladder an I was swole up like a pregnant cow dog, soes I went a looking fer the john. Seein how the piss line extended ten tractor langths out the door I kept a walkin and turnt a corner facing some closed elevador doors. I took a chance an whipped 'er out right there and then. I wanna take this moment to thank God, Jackie Sherrill, and Bucky Richardson that I was able to finish without them doors openin. I dont thank I coulda survived a Dallas Cop billy clubbin in my grain n barley soaked state.
Come the fourth qwarter this longhorn fella behind me kept yellin, "Hey Sherrill, I hear John Wayne Gasey used to dress up like a clown too!"
I wanted to confront this fella, but I dident fill like gettin my ass whooped, and besides I done added bout eight more pints a beer to my belly since the haff and my brain was swimmin somewheres tween the Skilla and the Caribs. My innerds was a bubblin up sumpin fierce soes I went a stumblin twords the john a figgerin to upheave.
This is where I might get a little sentamental. You see, all this talk about renavatin the Cotton Bowl makes me sad. Cuzz that mornin as I stumbled threw the bathroom stall and the rust spat from its tired hinges, I fell to the tiled floor where the grit has turned green with age and bad aim; desperately I gripped the base of that cherished old potty, lurched my flushed face over the discolored edge of the worn creaky seat, and emancipated the new year's contents of my soul into that cracked porcalin relic. At that moment, I knew without a shadow of a doubt, that the kin folk of Kyle Rote and Doak Walker once sat n shat upon that same sacred tank. ----- ... give me a moment to wipe the tears from my eyes... ----- Folks, I hope you understand why the Cotton Bowl can never be renavated. Theys just too much histry in that house.
The Cotton Bowl's an ALLSOME place, Amen.
Gig'em
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GHOST HORN
5000+ posts
05/06/06 04:40 AM
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Re: Why the Cotton Bowl should not EVER be renavat
[re: SpiderAg] |
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spidey , as always, you are wearin them burnt moron glasses too dern close. reallize, you stupid schoool of a university is not the promised land and jacky sheril is no lord and savior.
when will u finally learned it? join the horn fan once and fer all.
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longhornmatt
2500+ posts
05/06/06 04:40 AM
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Re: Why the Cotton Bowl should not EVER be renavat
[re: SpiderAg] |
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In reply to:
and emancipated the new year's contents of my soul into that cracked porcalin relic.
That was a pretty damn poetic line, with surprisingly few misspellings.
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unpaintedhuffhines
5000+ posts
05/06/06 04:48 AM
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Re: Why the Cotton Bowl should not EVER be renavated
[re: SpiderAg] |
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god bless hornfans
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Longhorn Al
2005 Omaha Sweepstakes Champion
05/06/06 04:54 AM
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Re: Why the Cotton Bowl should not EVER be renavat
[re: SpiderAg] |
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Welcome back.
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balzac
2500+ posts
05/06/06 05:01 AM
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Re: Why the Cotton Bowl should not EVER be renavated
[re: SpiderAg] |
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spin awhile
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Traffic
2500+ posts
05/06/06 06:34 AM
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Re: Why the Cotton Bowl should not EVER be renavat
[re: SpiderAg] |
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In reply to:
Cuzz that mornin as I stumbled threw the bathroom stall and the rust spat from its tired hinges, I fell to the tiled floor where the grit has turned green with age and bad aim; desperately I gripped the base of that cherished old potty, lurched my flushed face over the discolored edge of the worn creaky seat, and emancipated the new year's contents of my soul into that cracked porcalin relic.
Best. Sentence. Ever.
Texas Never Whispers
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smwhorn
2500+ posts
05/06/06 08:26 AM
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Re: Why the Cotton Bowl should not EVER be renavated
[re: SpiderAg] |
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Spidey:
Have you seen Brokeback Mountain yet?
"Meet me in the Land of Hope and Dreams. . . . . "--Springsteen
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2feathers
500+ posts
05/06/06 08:31 AM
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Re: Why the Cotton Bowl should not EVER be renavat
[re: SpiderAg] |
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Did SpiderAg done take one of them thar writin classes?  
"We are getting some cloud cover. If that happens it will help because it will shield the sun," Keith Jackson
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MisterBevo
1000+ posts
05/06/06 11:07 AM
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Re: Why the Cotton Bowl should not EVER be renavat
[re: SpiderAg] |
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I'm crying.
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OldHippie
500+ posts
05/06/06 11:22 AM
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Re: Why the Cotton Bowl should not EVER be renavated
[re: SpiderAg] |
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Amen to that brother Spidie. When comes yer time, may yer marune soul assend to it's rightful place in the pintheon of holey tradition.
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El Torito
1000+ posts
05/06/06 11:22 AM
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Re: Why the Cotton Bowl should not EVER be renavated
[re: SpiderAg] |
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Only Spidey could make a reference to John Wayne Gacy funny.
"Attention all planets of the Solar Federation. . .Attention all planets of the Solar Federation. . .We have assumed control. . .We have assumed control." - Rush, 2112.
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navblue
500+ posts
05/06/06 12:12 PM
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Re: Why the Cotton Bowl should not EVER be renavated
[re: SpiderAg] |
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Spider- I respect you....But that was a bit TOO MUCH information for us to know. Keep up them writing classes, you hear!
"UNCOMMON VALOR WAS A COMMON VIRTUE"- Admiral Chester Nimitz speaking of the Marines at IWO JIMA-Feb 1945.
" When you cross that ol' Red River that just don't mean a thing; Cause once you're down in TEXAS the HORNS are still the King"- paraphras
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Hooked
500+ posts
05/06/06 12:22 PM
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Re: Why the Cotton Bowl should not EVER be renavated
[re: SpiderAg] |
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Greatness.
It's been too long, Spidey.
"You tried your best and you failed miserably. The lesson is: 'never try'."
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KC-97HORN
2500+ posts
05/06/06 01:06 PM
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Re: Why the Cotton Bowl should not EVER be renavated
[re: SpiderAg] |
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Spidey- this line was pure literary prose, I just think that it went over a lot of peoples heads:
In reply to:
my brain was swimmin somewheres tween the Skilla and the Caribs.
 
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Squall
1000+ posts
05/06/06 03:00 PM
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Re: Why the Cotton Bowl should not EVER be renavat
[re: SpiderAg] |
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 SPIDEY
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Zone Read
25+ posts
05/06/06 03:25 PM
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Re: Why the Cotton Bowl should not EVER be renavated
[re: SpiderAg] |
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In reply to:
At that moment, I knew without a shadow of a doubt, that the kin folk of Kyle Rote and Doak Walker once sat n shat upon that same sacred tank.
That may be how long its been since those sacred tanks were cleaned.
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madscientist
2500+ posts
05/06/06 04:55 PM
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Re: Why the Cotton Bowl should not EVER be renavated
[re: SpiderAg] |
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about time a n00b got on the line.
genius, spidey, as per usual.
Like a sleepwalker waking, informed Aggies might become frightened and disoriented. Better to let your friends sleep than dismantle the fantasy land construct within which they feel safe and relevant.
-sinless1
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TXBabe97
2500+ posts
05/06/06 06:27 PM
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Re: Why the Cotton Bowl should not EVER be renavated
[re: SpiderAg] |
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In reply to:
I fell to the tiled floor where the grit has turned green with age and bad aim
That thar's poetry. Allsome.
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HoosierHorn
5000+ posts
05/06/06 07:21 PM
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Re: Why the Cotton Bowl should not EVER be renavated
[re: SpiderAg] |
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In reply to:
Skilla and the Caribs.
 
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